The Secret of Harmonious Relationships
Aug07

The Secret of Harmonious Relationships

To listen to my interview with Guy Finley, please go here: Exploring all the Aspects of Letting Go by Guy Finley Our relationships with one another are often a source of distress. In general, the principal form of conflict we experience with others has to do with some form of consideration that we feel they are not giving to us. We often suffer from thoughts like these: “She is not being respectful enough.” “He is not as kind as I want him to be.” “They just don’t care as deeply as I do.” However, if we will be courageous enough to see the truth of the next insight, and then admit its finding into our heart and mind, we can change the real root of this underlying sense of our dissatisfaction with others along with the conflict it generates between those involved: Many times the very thing we want from the person we are with — for example, respect, patience, kindness, love — is the very thing that we ourselves either lack at the moment or otherwise somehow are withholding from them. The “catch” here is that we are mostly unconscious to our actual inner condition in these encounters with others, and here’s a major reason why this happens: Hidden in each of us are certain clever “self-concealing devices” whose sole reason for being is to keep us asleep to ourselves and blindly serving their ends, most of which are to mechanically perpetuate struggle and conflict. One of the ways these conflict-producing characters stay undetected — while generating their strife — is to point the arrow of insufficiency at someone else. Each time this self successfully diverts our attention in this way here’s what unfolds: Not only are we kept from coming awake to ourselves, but in this engineered spiritual sleep we are rendered unable to realize that the very quality we judge as missing in the person or persons before us is actually lacking in ourselves! A little inner work on our part reveals the truth of our condition. We almost always place certain character demands upon others, but almost never see that the nature in us making these demands is without the very substance it cries out as missing. No wonder the circle of disharmony continues. In our spiritual sleep we act as its unconscious continuous circumference! What’s to be done? How can we change ourselves (first things first!) and at the same time help our friends and family grow in Spirit? How can we realize True Self, end this circle of conflict, and open ourselves to Real Conscience — one that could no more feel these...

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