Transitioning Out of a Soul Mate Relationship

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Q When you feel you are transitioning out of a soul
relationship… What if you are married to your soul mate and he or she does not want to end the current relationship? Should you stay in the marriage? How should you approach this?

A You may have heard this before but the best thing to do is to listen to your heart and what feels true and right for you. Sometimes, we can be quick to end a relationship when we are challenged rather than going through the roller coaster ride of emotions as we release the ego and really open to hearing the other person’s perspective as they share their feelings, needs, etc. It sounds like you are concerned about what his desires are for your relationship, meaning that you may stay in the relationship because of that, and I would say that if you are also feeling this way, then stay in the relationship and do the best you can to work it out.

The best thing when there are challenges that come up in a relationship is to have open, healthy communication. What I mean by that is allowing the other person to express what he is feeling without interruption and without judgment, even and especially if you don’t agree. Then you can express your own feelings in a non attacking manner. I recommend to my clients to say, “I feel,” a lot because it places the responsibility on you and not accusing the other person of anything, but just openly expressing how you both feel. The other thing is to know that nothing the other person says is personal against you. We react and interact in relationship with others from our previous experiences, our beliefs, behavior patterns, etc, so how we choose to be in any situation is from what we know.

Pay attention to what your heart is telling you, is this question coming from your inner voice confirming to you that you feel this transition occurring? Place yourself in the emotions you would feel if you were not in this relationship anymore, how do you feel? Imagine yourself resolving things and staying in this relationship, how do you feel? Is it your feelings that are telling you this or is it your soul mates or is others opinions? You are the one that is in this experience and not those who are around you, so it is best that you follow what you deeply know in your heart. Let it steer you…if you decide to transition out of this relationship, I would recommend still having open and healthy communication which will make it easier to transition with love and respect.