Cheating – The Issues Behind it and Is It the Same for Both Sexes?
I watched the movie Last Night and it prompted a discussion between a male friend of mine and myself. He said that he felt that if two people were married and both the man and the woman were tempted to be intimate with another, that the woman would naturally stop the advances from going any further because she is more emotionally involved in the relationship than the man. How do you feel about this?
I don’t subscribe to gender stereotypes because I feel there are so many factors involved. We are responsible, as individuals, for our own stuff that comes up in a relationship and believe me, it will. You will be challenged because relationships, and the best of them, help us to heal what may be lurking underneath our psyche waiting there to be noticed, and then taking the steps to release them. However, many times, it is our own responsibility when fear comes up in its many forms; jealousy, anger, envy, etc. to notice that it probably has nothing to do with the other person. What is the point of blaming it on your partner?
If we notice that something is coming up within ourselves and creating resentment and separation from our partner, we have a choice to communicate it and let it be resolved…keeping things inside only creates more feelings, behaviors, actions of separation. Cheating is an action of separation, IF you choose to have a monogamous union with another, AND being in intimate relationship/marriage with another CAN remain blissfully happy forever if you are able to be yourself, share your emotions, and respectfully help each other to be ultimately the best you can be.
Sometimes things and people change, and not all relationships are meant to last “forever” in a particular lifetime, so if it has come time that you feel this is what is meant to be, then take a look at it from a deeper perspective to see if what you are feeling is coming from the heart and not the many disguises that fear can create.
I don’t believe that women are more emotionally invested in a relationship, at least not from the gender stereotype perspective. Everyone is different from how they feel about a partner and their relationship regardless of their sex and there are many underlying factors that determine this (which can all go hand in hand): their beliefs, their emotions, their previous experiences…
Care to share what you feel?